Lover's Shadows

What Happens in Therapy? 

When our clients present in crises such as depression, anxiety, relationship issues, or abuse, they leave their first session with a range of simple, practical tools to get them through the week. 
It is a tough decision to come to therapy, and we get it. We aim to alleviate the initial distress and, in the following sessions, begin to figure out the causes together. Many clients say things like ‘I just don’t know where to start’. Don’t worry, leave that to us. It will all come out in time, no matter how ‘garbled’ you feel it will be. What is unresolved will always come up again.

The relationship between client and therapist is paramount; all forms of communication are entirely confidential. You will find that our therapists bring their personalities into the room rather than the cold demeanour that you may have experienced in the past. Our therapists are warm, friendly and non-judgemental. You will find empathy, unconditional positive regard and support in a way that is unique to a therapeutic relationship. The way that therapy should be. 

You don’t have to sit in a room either; it’s not ‘compulsory’. If you are more comfortable walking in the open or having a coffee, that’s just fine. It’s your session, and we will do whatever works for you. Also, it’s important to us for you to know that therapy is not all doom and gloom. There will be some laughter during our time together, too, as we relax into our work together. 

We believe that it is essential for our clients to ‘click’ with their therapist, which works both ways. This is crucial in building a lasting, workable relationship filled with trust and respect. 

Once the initial crisis is over, we find that our clients continue to come to therapy. To use a metaphor, it is like the crisis becomes the name on the box, and we’ve taken a peek inside. When clients feel strong enough to tackle whatever is found in the box, the contents are pulled out and spread across the table. The client and therapist have a good look at what is found, and the client decides what they want to keep, and they want to discard once and for all finally. 

We understand that therapy is difficult. Together, we will explore challenging situations and thoughts. This can be an emotional time but be assured we are there for you every step of the way. Sometimes therapy can be advice-giving, but it is often a process for the client to unravel thoughts and ruminations that have plagued them for many years, like a ball of tangled wool.

Our therapists believe that the client does most of the work. They are driving the bus, and the therapist is simply giving gentle direction. If the client is not ready to look at a specific topic, that is fine with us. We believe they will know when they are ready and will never be pushed in a direction they are not ready to take. There is no value in pushing or taking a confrontational approach. We will know this intuitively and will ‘check in’ with you along the way. Our relationship is always transparent. Sometimes, we talk about what is happening in the room and even the therapeutic relationship itself. 

Research has shown that most of the therapy happens outside of the sessions. Because a lot happens in the sessions, much of the conversation is worked through during the week after. Sometimes, it may feel like there are many questions, and then you forget them. This is quite normal. Remember, what is unresolved will always reappear.